Anxiety of getting replaced

https://www.reddit.com/r/Leadership/?f=flair_name%3A"Question"

Hi, I’m really sad and depressed now and I want to throw up. So here it goes, I got hired for Medical Front Desk Receptionist in January. I've been doing really good all managers have said so themselves. Here is the issue, a new guy started there. He's nice a little annoying but overall a great person. I'm so worried because he's gonna start doing a better job then me. Then my managers will slowly not think about doing good and I will get fired. I know he's gonna end up doing better then me because what took me almost a month seems to take him like a week. He's better than me and I know he is. My managers are gonna slowly find this out I just know they are and I will get fired. Idk what to do. What can I do? I'm pretty much doomed for at this point. Is there any saving this job?

I love my job so much. But I’m like a underdog and I feel like I will be outshined which is ok I don’t need the spotlight. I just want my team to know I’m worthy enough to stay on the team.

Cale's Response:

There are so many variables as to what makes a best fit for any role. What will stand out to you are the specific areas that you see opportunity for improvement in yourself, what stands out to everyone else are the areas you excel at, and there are some.

You and them are not the same person, you each bring something unique and valuable to the team. The spaces that the two of you differ are 1000 different points other than "will do a better job than me." Each of you will be able to handle specific kinds of emergencies differently, will be able to handle specific kinds of annoying people differently, will be able to relate with or connect with different co-workers. These and so many other points are what make each of you well qualified for the role, as part of the same team. And even if, -this is not the case, but even if it were- the two of you are identical except for skill in this specific set of tasks, one of you will not be able to handle 100% of the work load, 100% of the time, that is how you get burnt out.

See how you can shift your mindset, you two are not in competition with one another (unless you have been told that specifically, in which case you are working for some messed up managers), shift your mindset towards teamwork. No one wins unless everybody wins (specifically your customers, the folks you are helping, your co-workers, etc).

Shift your mindset, shift your focus, shift your attention. When you find yourself in a spiral, stop, get some movement (a walk, a run, some DDR, even just a walk to the bathroom and back), get outside if you can (sunlight is good if it is light outside).

Your feelings and emotions are real, they are signals for you to use in making decisions and taking action, but that doesn't mean we aren't getting some inaccurate signals, or that we know how to adjust according to the signals (emotions) we are getting.

Think of a traffic light. It is supposed to give you a signal that either: or is safe to drive forward (green), it is not safe to drive forward (red) or it is about to become red, so consider stopping if you can (yellow) - these in the US at least. The signals are not fact: I have waited at a red light for 5 minutes with no other cars, it was perfectly safe for me to drive forward- the red signal was inaccurate. And I have seen several folks drive forward on a green light and get hit from the side, it was not actually safe to drive, the green light was inaccurate. (Disregard the factor of the law, and that if I don't follow the traffic signals I can get a ticket, that is where this analogy breaks down).

So when I receive the traffic light signal (the feeling and emotions that I will lose my job because this other person is "better than me") I take in that signal and fact check it. Green light means that I check the cross streets, I look to see if there are pedestrians in the intersection- I don't take the green light as fact, I take it as a signal. When I get the feeling that I'm going to be fired, I fact check it: I say "thank you emotions for the signal, let's see if you are correct" and I review the day: did my manager give me clear feedback about my performance? Did HR tell me there is only budget for one person in this role?

It is very easy to spiral out over these things, break the spiral- get some movement, get outside, fact check your signals.